If the whipped-cream “pies” to the mush weren’t eye-wink enough …

“We tell ‘em if they win, they get a trip, two tickets to anywhere WestJet flies,” cackled Bo Levi Mitchell, another installment of the annual Rookie of the Year hoodwinking successfully completed.

“Nick (Arbuckle)’s like: ‘I’m going to Hawaii!’

“Do they buy it?

“Huff sells it, man. He’s up there like: ‘Bo’s a past winner. Smitty’s a past winner. Alex is a past winner. These guys are still here after four, five, six, whatever, years, they’re all important players to this team and this is how they got started, too …’ Yada, yada, yada.

“So we ask the rookies to leave the room, as if we’re going to pick one. Then we decide which guys we’re gonna pie in the face.

“They’re all sitting there, wondering where they’re gonna go with those two WestJet tickets. Then just before we pie ‘em, I’m like: ‘No, man, the trip’s fake.’

And: Pow!

“So do they buy it? Oh, yes, they (bleep)ing buy it. Every (bleep)ing year.”

If the stress of two weeks between meaningful games, the uncertainty of whether Winnipeg or Saskatchewan will provide the final hurdle to a third Grey Cup appearance in a row and fourth in six Novembers, is somehow gnawing at the innards of the Calgary Stampeders, well, they’re doing an Actor’s Studio-calibre job of disguising it.

That trademark mojo – even had it ebbed to any worrisome degree during the late-season three-game swoon – is back.

“You can tell we’re back to being ourselves,’’ said DB Jamar Wall. “We’re out there having fun, flying around. You saw that today.

“What this week allows us to do is build on what we did last week.

“We had a question put to us in B.C., a tough question in a tough situation: Are you going to man up or not? And we came out and answered it. We played ball. We performed.”

Saturday’s fish-or-cut-first-place-bait 26-9 slapdown of the B.C. cauterized the bleeding and has the Stamps re-energized.

Having finished first in the West five of the past six seasons, it’s not as if they aren’t familiar with the drill by now:

Sunday rundown. Monday through Wednesday off. Thursday through Saturday back at work. Semi-final Sunday and Monday off.

Then back to the routine Tuesday for the final push to Sunday kick-off.

“Besides resting up and healing up, this week gives a few extra days to work on details, nuances, that we know we can be better at,’’ said defensive tackle Junior Turner. “Running games as a D-line, back end and front end communication. Tweak things, polish things, clean up things. Just little things like that that make a big difference.

“Yeah, we’ve been down this road before but we went through some adversity the last month. So I think that’s helped our character, taught us some lessons, put our young guys in a trial by fire.

“All these things I think have fallen into place for a reason.”

Mitchell, too, seems at ease in the situation.

“This is the formula that’s worked for us the last couple years,’’ reckoned the divisional MOP finalist. “Dave, Huff and the coaches do a good job of managing this week. It’s not new to us. We’re not searching for answers.

“Winning that last game really helps. Just getting the confidence going allows us to locked in and improve individually, which makes the group better.”

So all that’s left is to await the winner of Winnipeg-Saskatchewan.

“Either. Or,’’ said Wall. “We can’t pick. Shouldn’t matter who we play. Just be here on time and be ready.

“Yeah, we’re a pretty experienced team, but don’t forget that we’ve also got a lot of new pieces, especially with all the injuries. We’ve been trying to mould together for a while now, get comfortable with the guy beside us. And I feel like we’re finally there.

“That last game gives us confidence that when we find ourselves – this group, here, now – in a do-or-die situation, we know what’s needed and have the knowledge that we’ve done it before.

“Meaning we have no excuses. Other than shut up and do the job.”

So, sorry, freshmen, no two free tickets to Hawaii. Or anywhere else WestJet flies, for that matter.

But, believe it or not, a seat on a bus up to Edmonton with your BFFs the second last week of November would be a pretty sweet alternative.